There are two thought systems in mind to choose from: ego’s or God’s.
The ego’s thought system provides many random and meaningless questions along with the stage for a mental battle with an imaginary self that leads nowhere.
The Holy Spirit is Perfectly Stable, the Stage for God, God’s Thought – the One Answer to all questions that leads only back to One Self, One Love. The ego, in its seeming “hold” over mind, only actually occupies a very small part of it, which can be noticed and surrendered to Greater Mind. One can pick a stage to battle on, or one can gladly relinquish the entire act.
God would have one know only Love (please note, the latter statement is anthropomorphizing God, but it is said in this way to provide the Context that God is only Love). Ego, the part of mind that experiences out variegation in order to confirm the idea of separation from Love would have one become hateful and murderous to self and others, in order to “protect” its own variegated thought from dissolving in Love. Thus, the ego has been called a “villain” for it’s foundation, for its stage; the mental twists and turns it takes to keep the belief in separation alive can seem to provide a veritable maze for its maker to undo, a prison for its prison guard to escape, a zoo for it’s keeper to languish and die in. Look at, then bypass via surrender to the Holy Spirit the maze/prison/zoo vs set out to undo it. It is nothing, made of the part of mind that believes it can use nothing to do something. Give it to the Holy Spirit, Who will bypass the whole thing.
I once summoned my ego; I wanted to look at it – I wanted to face it. And as I consciously did so, the body couldn’t breathe properly, it lay as if pinned and gasping for air, and yet, it was breathing. The ego part of my mind said, “You are suffocating” and yet, I was not – the body was not actually suffocating, nor was the mind experiencing suffocation while the body was gasping. The mind was focused on the script to experience ego.
The variegated levels of consciousness needed to go away from Perfect Love were all distinctly happening simultaneously, unified only by my Observation; I was the Director, the Writer, the Actor, and the Audience in the play.
I opened my arms with love and tenderly held ego in them; it was dangerous looking, but I wanted it on a purely visceral level. It was as if I couldn’t breathe without it. It had definite form – it was just as I imagined it, furry and bite-y, like a ferret. It struggled fiercely, and as I tried to hold onto it without getting bit (a loving, almost motherly kind of oh, just settle while I loves you, will you, thought running through mind) the gasping increased. Still, I was not the body; I was not the gasping.
I didn’t want to, I wanted to calm the ego-pet with “my love”, but I had to let it go from my arms, and watch it run off, and notice that the gasping had stopped as if it had never started.
I came to consciousness and cried great, empty, clean, love-filled, compassionate tears over having allowed myself to look at and let ego go. I’d loved it; in a twisted way, and it would return, if I experienced it back – but encompassing all of that was the Pure Joy from the knowledge that I’d been willing – not to struggle to the death to hang on to it – but that I had been willing, in the face of wanting it, to let it go. And innate was the knowledge that it was up to me to choose the ego’s or the Holy Spirit’s thought system and to experience out the effects.
I reached and struggled and questioned and wanted and not-wanted when I brought ego to mind, and yet I Knew the Answer Perfectly, as it was Always Known, when I let it go.