For spiritual students, folks who want to “Know Thyself” beyond the flesh, life with a body controlled by a mind can be an effort of ongoing surrender. The body, being a mindfully imposed limitation on spirit’s Freedom, is fraught with problems sourced by that which chose to separate from God in the first place. Add the abundance of other bodies in close proximity that chose to leave God, and God’s Love can seemingly get completely occluded.
Mind you, it only seems this way – the knowingness that God is present is always present internally. The dramas of bodily life are what literally seem to cancel out the actual loving sensation of the Presence of God; this happens until one can tell the difference between truth and illusion. The belief in drama will ever continue to attempt to illicit the fight or flight response in its contenders, so for the spiritual student, it seems best to avoid it. Keeping holy company helps if possible. By holy company I mean other souls more interested in realizing the Self than in simply maintaining the appearance of the flesh.
I’ve written (attempted to write about them, no word can possibly be true to God’s Word) about spiritually illuminating experiences. Often the body is left like a hot potato (to quote a favorite spiritual teacher Dr Hawkins) when the Self is Realized – the soul simply goes Home and dust simply goes back to dust. In this case, the body was kept out of love (attachment love for my husband and children). It was seemingly kept as part of agreements that were made a priori to the flesh. Dissolving those agreements by fulfilling them seems to be a higher purpose; once done, the body can rest in peace.
When the body remains, so does all of its baggage. It’s there in the general consciousness. It’s there in family. It’s there in the products of parenting. It’s there in the connections that were made. It’s there in every cell of the body itself. The Self may have been realized, yet it is impossible to describe to those around, and it is impossible to cover over seemingly hard truths with niceties. It’s like that ‘crabs in the bucket’ phenomenon goes on – one crab on the top of the pile tries to leave but can’t; the rest in the pile pull it back in.
The experience of the Self without form is indescribable bliss, perfect satiation, absolute completion, pure fulfillment. Returning to a body’s apparent-through-bodily-witnesses previous programming is not a comfortable experience, to say the least; this is where the continual effort to surrender comes in. I chant the Maha mantra in my head with Krishna as my holy company. I do EFT. I use the thymus thump, the muscle test and the Map of Consciousness ® by Dr David R Hawkins. Some days I feel like Mary of Magdalene might have when she went through a year of exorcisms with Jesus Christ. Some days it is like riding a roller coaster with no end to the track as I go back and forth between the Silent Self and managing the flesh and its attachments.
Perhaps things are still unstable between the two realms because I am only just becoming mature enough to literally travel the straight and narrow. Years ago, in a vision, while lying in a messy bedroom with a whole lot of personal baggage cluttered all around me, I saw the Path. It was well lit then, as it is well lit now. In the name of “more to do first”, it only seemed as if conditions were not right yet to walk it.